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<title>»»---» 𝑴𝒐𝒐𝒏𝒍𝒊𝒕 𝑺𝒖𝒊𝒄𝒊𝒅𝒆 «---«« by Pill0w_Fath3r</title>
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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27890296">»»---» 𝑴𝒐𝒐𝒏𝒍𝒊𝒕 𝑺𝒖𝒊𝒄𝒊𝒅𝒆 «---««</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pill0w_Fath3r/pseuds/Pill0w_Fath3r'>Pill0w_Fath3r</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Fall Out Boy, My Chemical Romance</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>AU, Band Fic, Gay, M/M, Suicide Attempt</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 16:21:17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,003</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27890296</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pill0w_Fath3r/pseuds/Pill0w_Fath3r</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>When I say Patrick got the shitty end of the stick I mean it. <br/>He was abandoned by everyone except his closest friend, Pete.<br/>His parents stopped talking to him exactly 1 week after he turned 18, He was bullied in school and was often found beat up in the bathroom after breaks because he tried to hide from the jocks.<br/>Tonight he'd finally had enough and went to a place he promised Pete he'd never go again.<br/>Patrick was found by a college student in a growing band.<br/>Maybe things would actually get better.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Geetrick - Relationship</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>»»---» 𝑴𝒐𝒐𝒏𝒍𝒊𝒕 𝑺𝒖𝒊𝒄𝒊𝒅𝒆 «---««</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"Hey Pete, I'm going out for a while, eat dinner without me, bye!" Patrick called into the house and heard a small worried "Alright Pattycakes, be safe, bye." from his best friend. He grumbled under his breath at the nickname he so despised. He walked out into the chilly winter air, smiling softly at the feeling of the crisp air against his face as he walked towards the bridge he had promised Pete and himself, he'd never go again.<br/>The occasional car drove by, breaking the night's silence with the soft whirring of the engine. Patrick chuckled as nice memories of family road trips and school outings flashed through his mind. A gentle breeze started up again and with that the rustling of bushes and trees. The small smile on his face soon dissipated as he approached the bridge and remembered this wasn’t one of his usual night walks. <br/>He climbed the railing and just sat there. He pulled a beer out of his pocket and began to drink. ‘May as well have some kind fun in my last..’ He checked his phone for the time “11:45” it read. ‘15 minutes.’<br/>Slowly dopamine was released into his system, but not enough for him to forget his problems, for him to live an hour of blissful ignorance. Not enough time for him to enjoy himself before the thoughts start up once more… Then again, they hadn’t stopped yet for them to start again. He finished his beer and took off his jacket, wrapping it around the glass bottle. Patrick threw the wrapped bottle down to the ground below.<br/>He looked up into the sky, the cool light of the moon beating down on him like a spotlight. An audience of stars anticipating his performance of a beautifully depressing dance of death. <br/>Tears welled up in his eyes all he wanted was death... But would he ultimately regret his decision? This was what he wanted to jump to the ground below and bleed to death or break his neck on impact. Right?<br/>A small ball of guilt rested in his gut, he knew the toll this would have on his family, but he lost the ability to care somehow. Patrick stood on the edge of the bridge, just slightly hanging onto the railing still. He blocked out the world around him, the rustling of trees, the barking dogs who thought the trees were the quiet whispers of intruders and the ignorant cars behind him, who saw the teenager preparing to leap into the bushland below but didn’t pull over to stop the boy from jumping.<br/>Patrick smiled sadly and let his hands relax, the grip he held on the cold metal of the railing disappearing, falling to his sweet release, to a place better for him. That was until a warm hand slipped itself around his wrist.</p>
<p>Patrick came to a quick halt. “What the hell?” the brunette boy whispered looking back up at his savior. “You’re not going tonight hun, not if I can help it.” The raven-haired man smiled warmly, but sadly and pulled the boy back up, lifting him up over the railing.<br/>“Please? Just let me leave, it's for the best, please?” Patrick pleaded with the man holding him, who shook his head softly. “No sweetheart, I’m not letting you end it, it’s not better for you, for your friends. I’ve struggled as well, I know what it’s like. Please, it’s not worth it.”<br/>“I don’t even know who you are! For all, I know you could be some random creep! Just let me fucking jump you ass…” Patrick had started yelling but slowly his voice softened and tears of anger turned back to tears of sadness. <br/>The red-haired man gently tried to lead Patrick off of the bridge, introducing himself on the way. “I’m Gerard, mind telling me your name hun?” Gerard whispered, hoping not to trigger the boy’s fight or flight because he knew in this case, if he scared the teenager, he would run back to the railing.<br/>“Patrick… but you can call me what you like I guess” Patrick whispered back, the pain in his voice evident. “Well Patrick, do you feel comfortable with just sitting with me and talking for a while?” Gerard said, slightly louder, testing the boundaries slightly. He looked at Patrick, who had been staring at him and nodding slightly and smiled. “Okay, hun, where would you like to go?” Gerard made it a point to keep the other teenager mostly in control as to keep him the most comfortable and not make him too afraid to speak.<br/>Patrick looked back at the rail and the voice in his head told him to make a run for it, that Gerard was terrible and was only going to hurt him more. “I just wanna live my life, like a normal teenager… not like this, please” Patrick whispered, Gerard, picked up on this and questioned it. “What was that sweetheart?” Patrick’s eyes widened and tears that had been resting on the brim of his eyes collapsed in raging waterfalls. “Nothing! I’m fine! Don’t worry! It’s cold you should go, I’ll be okay, I promise” Patrick yelped quietly, shivering slightly as the breeze picked up again.<br/>“I’m not leaving you,” Gerard said sternly, slipping his jacket off and wrapping it around the shorter boy’s shoulders. Almost immediately after, Patrick took the jacket from around his shoulders pressing it back against Gerard’s chest. “You’ll get sick, keep it, Gerard,” Patrick said looking back at the railing again. </p>
<p>Gerard took it and wrapped back around Patrick’s shoulders. “No Tricky, I’ll be fine, please take it” Gerard pleaded with the boy. Patrick whined but his instinct to keep warm got the better of him so he muttered a soft “Thank you” and put his arms into the sleeves. Gerard smiled slightly, hoping he was making some kind of progress with the 15-year-old.<br/>Patrick sighed and looked up at Gerard's face, noticing his nose and cheeks reddening from the cold.<br/>Against his better judgement, Patrick listened to the voice's instructions. He slipped the jacket off, taking a deep breath as he did and shoved it back into Gerard's chest, shocking the taller man. Patrick ran back towards the rail, Gerard stood there, staring like a deer in headlights, he couldn’t bring his body to move as he watched the teen’s thin frame leap effortlessly over the short railing.<br/>“What…? No-” Gerard’s meaningless whisper sounded like a scream in the silence. He knew him just standing in the middle of the road crying would look awfully strange to onlookers, or perhaps it wouldn’t, perhaps they’d look on sympathetically and wonder why he was sad. Tears rolled down his cheeks, he wasn’t ready to let this stranger die and so he did the one thing he knew he wasn’t allowed to. He slipped a red sheet of paper and his lighter out of his pocket. He set fire to it and whispered a quiet incantation it was quick, he hoped the boy hadn’t yet hit the ground.<br/>Quickly he found out and the boy showed up in his arms, alive but scratched. Gerard immediately wrapped his jacket and arms around the boy “I told you’re not ending it tonight and I meant it as a promise Patrick.” Patrick stared up at Gerard, wide eyed and pale “Wh-why are you so set on this?” <br/>“I care, you’ll regret it, you’ll be okay, everything will be”</p>
<p>Tears filled Patrick’s eyes “Did I say something wrong? I’m sorry” Gerard rushed to apologize seeing the shorter boy's tears. “N-No you didn’t, you’ve said all the right things actually… thank you” Patrick whispered looking up at the taller male.<br/>‘What do you mean, he didn’t say anything right, he’s lying to you, fucking hell you’re a dumbass’<br/> “Of course, are you still okay with talking though?” Gerard asked, Patrick smiled, it was small and sad but it was still there “Mhm.”</p>
<p>Gerard slid his hand into Patrick’s and led him off of the bridge. “Are you feeling better?” Gerard’s questions hung begrudgingly in the air. “A little, thank you for saving me.” </p>
<p>‘Why are you thanking him, he stopped you from achieving your goal’</p>
<p>Patrick’s eyebrows furrowed, this voice was one of the things that got him to this point, he wanted it gone, no, needed it gone. “You okay? You look frustrated, did I do something?”<br/>‘Say “Yes, you saved me.”’<br/>“No, you didn’t do anything wrong don’t worry.”<br/>“What it says isn’t true, try not to listen to it, when that voice in your head says something I want you to squeeze my hand as tight as you can, okay?” Gerard said gently, watching as Patrick nodded slowly and sheepishly.</p>
<p>‘What’re you doing? He’s only going to hurt you, i’m trying to help you’</p>
<p>Patrick tightened his grip on Gerard’s hand, which squeezed back reassuringly “You seem really cool, I like your hair” Gerard complimented, making Patrick’s face flush red. “Do you play any instruments, Tricky?” Gerard asked, trying to keep the other male consumed in something other than his thoughts. “I do, I play guitar” <br/>“That’s cool, so do I.”<br/>“Do you want to be in a band?”<br/>“Yeah, I’m in one with my friend’s actually.”<br/>“Woah! Holy smokes that’s cool. I want to be in a band. My friend and I have some stuff planned for it, what’s your band's name? What do you do in it?”  Patrick’s question was grasped by the air, silence rested between them for a moment. Just enough time for the thoughts to get in.</p>
<p>‘If you were in a band you’d only end up kicked out, left to the side while the rest excel, you’re useless’</p>
<p>Patrick squeezed Gerard’s hand again “I sing, the band’s called My Chemical Romance. I’d love to hear you play sometime though `Tricky” Patrick smiled “Sure.”<br/>Another silence fell over the two, this time Patrick’s head was filled with his own thoughts, drowning out the voice in his head. While it was quiet, it was still there.</p>
<p>‘Patrick you know you’re useless, you’ll never make it in a band, why do you think all the groups you’re a part of fail?’</p>
<p>“They fail because of me..” Gerard’s eyes widened as the words tumbled out of Patrick’s mouth and the pressure on his hand greatened as the shorter man squeezed it. “Who?”<br/>“Past groups I’ve been in.”<br/>“Can you explain?”<br/>“I’ve been in a few school clubs, like chess and music, we always lost any competitions we entered. I was also in band before, it failed miserably and disbanded a while ago, they’d probably be great and going places”<br/>“Patrick, there’s another reality where you are rocking on with them, where they are great, where you’re doing better than ever. Just because of the fact that it isn’t this one, doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist” Gerard spoke confidently, a glimmer lit up in Patrick’s eyes, the sheer thought of his band going big and playing shows made him happier than he once was.. “It’d be a dream come true, it doesn’t even need to be the band I was with”  Patrick continued rambling about what he wanted his life to be. Gerard smiled as he listened to Patrick talk about his plans for life. “Then something pretty big happened and I dated my suicide, for tonight, November 14th” Patrick paused for a moment “but you stopped me, and surprisingly, I couldn’t be more thankful for it” Gerard smiled warmly. </p>
<p>The conversation finished as the two stepped off of the asphalt and onto the grass.<br/>“So Patrick, would you still like to just sit somewhere and talk? Or would you like me to just walk you home?” Patrick took a moment to ponder on the question.<br/>‘Don’t do it’</p>
<p>Patrick shook his head, shaking off the thought “Definitely, I know a nice place in a near-by park.” He said smiling up at Gerard who nodded and continued walking as Patrick took the lead.</p>
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